Germany, that great nation that has gifted humanity with
both Marxism and Nazism, has again broken new ground. Germany is now the first European country to
recognize a third,
'indeterminate”, gender.
That’s right, German parents no longer have to settle for
the boring old “M” or “F” on their birth certificates. Instead, they can opt for the “I” indeterminate”
option; thereby freeing their offspring from the tedium of boyhood or
girlhood. By taking a cue from their
southern neighbor, Germans will be able to endow future generations with the
blessing of gender neutrality.
What, you ask, does this have to do with getting free ride
to college? Simple. If the Indeterminate option catches on in
America, as the other aforementioned Germanic innovations have, the first
generation of America “I-gender” children will be shoo-ins to win collegiate
athletic scholarships.
As college sports fans are aware, Title IX is a portion of the Education Amendments of 1972. It states (in part) that no
person in the United States shall, on the basis of sex, be excluded from
participation in, be denied the benefits of, or be subjected to discrimination
under any education program or activity receiving federal financial assistance. Its effect on sports was that colleges that
offer scholarships to men in big money making sports such as football and basketball;
must offer a comparable number of athletic scholarships to women. Because of this, enterprising parents have
been pushing their daughters into variety of sports in hopes of a free
education payout.
Therefore, the path to a
free college education should be clear.
If the U.S. welcomes a new, third gender into the mix, local towns and
school districts will obligated to provide sports programs for Indeterminate
kids in addition to their Boys and Girls leagues. Likewise, colleges will be required to offer Indeterminate
athletic programs to complement Men’s and Women’s sports. And of course, these institutions will be
required to offer a proportional number of scholarships to “I”s as they do to Men
and Women.
My guess is that when the I-option
is first made available most American parents, outside of Berkley, Cambridge
and Hollywood, will be slow on the uptake.
They may skittish about branding little Johnny with an “I” if is not an
alpha male or little Susie with the “I” if she is not a beauty queen. But for those moms and dads with guts and
foresight, they will see that giving their youngsters the “I” will virtually
guarantee a free ticket to America’s most hallowed halls of learning.
When it comes to the future
of higher education, the “I”s have it.
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